soooo.. how is it that yoo can make a decision to be nice? but still end up feeling like a total jerk?!!

i git stuck on the paradox that is honesty sometimes.. how honest are you supposed to be? people say to just stick to always telling the truth.. but do yoo ever feel justified in lying to spare someone's feelings? here.. umm.. suppose you have a friend.. and they are real stinky.. they ask you one day.."do i smell?" .. are yoo reallllllyyy supposed to tell them that they could kill the iraqi army by standing in the neighboring country??? kimmie votes nay! have a heart!

there are obvious instances when the truth should never be traded for a sugar-coated lie.. this is clearly not in reference to such times.. i just find myself seeking the greater good and conjuring up excuses that are not the entire reason, but not entirely NOT either.. its a slight twist on the truth.. but everyone's happier in the end.. i don't have to feel like a jerk for feeling the way i feel.. and they dont have to feel like a loser for making me feel that way.. isnt that the utilitarian solution?

apparently NOT.. because theres always little holes in the elaborate "excuse" that ive conjured.. yuck..

on the other hand, am i just a big chicken that cant handle telling bad news..? that makes me selfish then doesnt it? cuz i dont want to have to be the bad messenger.. hmm...

bottom line.. a bad situation is a bad situation.. yoor screwed either way.. i guess honesty is the default.. when in doubt.. be honest.. *sigh* i feel much better having worked that out.. ^_^